Sunday, December 4, 2011

Restaurant Review: Kelly's McDonald's of Dickinson, North Dakota - A Parody

ByTerrye Toombs

Finding ourselves in Dickinson, North Dakota at dinner time and without reservations, we pulled into the local McDonald's hoping for a passable meal. After a short wait behind a white caravan filled with half of a local high school sports team, and a green Pontiac firebird with two 20 some-things out on a date, we were greeted by the friendly voice emanating from the display & speaker. We explained that we didn't have reservations and as it was a Friday evening, we asked if they would be able to accommodate us. The disembodied voice assured us that it would not be a problem.

A little background:

Kelly's McDonalds is located at 212 Museum Drive, Dickinson ND 58601. A great spot for a quick bite after visiting the Dakota Dinosaur Museum located 0.01 miles to the east. In addition to a quick and accurate drive thru window, the establishment offers indoor, smoke-free dining, and a seasonal covered outdoor dining area behind the restaurant.

The Menu:

Kelly's McDonald's offers a nice selection of American fare; including a variety of hamburgers and cheeseburgers, chicken sandwiches, chicken strips & nuggets, wraps, salads, French fries, colas, shakes, and coffees. Prices tend to be slightly higher given that the area is in the midst of an oil boom and many of the oil companies and drilling support service companies are housing their workers in the surrounding over-priced hotels and motels.

My husband selected the double quarter pounder with cheese, small fries and an iced tea. Our almost 5 year old preferred the ten piece chicken nuggets with ranch dressing and an ice water. I opted for the grilled chicken bacon ranch salad with an iced tea to complement.

Our food arrived quickly and as ordered. The professionally prepared burger and tender nuggets were each served in an attractive thick cardboard container with eye-catching graphics proclaiming the contents of the package. The fries were embraced in a paper sleeve that provided easy access to the delectable and mildly salted potato munchies. My grilled chicken bacon ranch salad was pleasingly enshrined in a plastic bowl, although slightly difficult to open after stealing a French fry (ok, more like 5). The properly chilled sweet teas were poured into Styrofoam steins with precisely the correct amount of ice.

The Service:

The drive-up window person accepting our payment was a humorless, no nonsense, strictly business type and was highly efficient and accurate. She has a great future as an accountant, or perhaps a prison guard.

The drive up window person delivering our food was friendly and helpful, asking if we would need croutons, ketchup or extra napkins. We figured he was going to be an outstanding logistics manager once he got past the awkward, pimple-faced era of his life and graduated from high school.

The Hours:

Restaurant: Sun thru Thurs 5am - 11pm. Fri and Sat 5am - 12am. Drive Thru: Same as the restaurant.


The neon d├ęcor is typical fast food but not overly offensive or distracting. It lacks musical accompaniment once the car stereo has been muted for ordering. Typical patrons are hordes of local college students hanging out after class, high school sports teams grabbing a quick snack before the long, arduous journey back to the obscure town they hail from, and famished oil field workers. All in all, Kelly's McDonald's offers a quick and filling meal for a family on the go.

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